2010...a family odyssey

After Christmas, I always seem to get a case of the post-holiday blues, and this year has been no different...but this year I'm also feeling some anxiety about the year to come...a year that looks to be full of pretty big changes for our family. Yes, I know change is inevitable, and I know I'm supposed to embrace it, but don't expect to see me giving change any big ol' bear hugs anytime soon. I am definitely a creature of habit, and change does not get along well with my love of order. That being said, I know that change can be good, and the changes ahead this year most likely WILL be good...but that doesn't mean they will be easy.

For instance, in just over a week my first born son will turn five years old, and in a few short months he will leave the day care he has attended since he was an infant and start Kindergarten. New school, new schedule, new routine, new friends...big changes all around. And (I imagine) the beginning of the end of my sweet, innocent baby boy. I'm trying hard to enjoy his unsolicited kisses, hugs, and "I love you's" while they last, but I know their days are probably numbered. He has already announced that he wants to ride the bus to school, although he did (grudgingly) agree that I could drive him there the first day. Of course I am excited for him to begin this new adventure, but it's definitely bittersweet.

Then there's my husband, who apparently felt that one ridiculously dangerous job (firefighter) just wasn't enough, and decided to take on another (cop). As long as I've known him, his goal has been to become an arson investigator, and last fall he got his wish. So now instead of fighting fires, he will be chasing down arsonists. He will complete his training this spring, and effectively start a whole new career. We won't know until then whether he'll be on a regular day shift or the overnight shift, which has a schedule that's even more complicated than the shift work he did as a firefighter. Even though I used to complain about his schedule at the fire station, it was what I was used to after nearly eight years of marriage. And even though it probably sounds strange, I didn't really worry that much about him when he was working as a firefighter...I knew he was smart and well trained, and frankly there just aren't that many fires anyway. So not only a new job and a new schedule, but a whole new set of worries. Don't get me wrong, I am thrilled that he is getting an opportunity to pursue the career path he has dreamed of for so long...it's just going to take me a while to adjust.

And then there's my baby, who's actually not a baby at all anymore, and in reality will be the most changed by the end of this year, considering he seems to be changing daily. If all goes as planned, he will be out of diapers and sleeping in a "big boy bed" by next Christmas. Exciting? Absolutely. But I also know that these milestones are marking the end of the baby experience for us...and while I have no desire for a third child, for some reason that still makes me a little sad.

As for me, 2010 will be the last year of my thirties...ouch. And while I don't really think my life will be all that different when I hit 40, there's just something about that number...

But I was reminded this past week of what is sure and steady in my life, and that is the love and support of my family and friends, many of whom turned out to celebrate my birthday with me.

In a world of change, it sure is good to know that some things are forever.